You need a coach that understands your world as a business owner. But you also need a coach that your spouse feels comfortable with because her engagement is mission critical at this point. You’ve tried a traditional therapist, but didn’t feel she understood your unique world as an entrepreneur. Maybe you even felt like all your therapy sessions were focused on the work YOU needed to do. You started to feel attacked, and wondered when it was going to be your turn to talk about your frustrations.
You need to get on the same page as your wife, but she’s tired of being sucked into your orbit all the time. She knows you both need to level up as a couple, but she wants to do it at her pace, and on her terms. You’re frustrated as hell, because you have all the tools and know how to support her, but she shuts down every time you try and help.
This is one of the biggest mistakes I see entrepreneurs make in marriage. Every day I have a client or prospect tell me “Kelly, my wife is amazing. She’s so talented. She’s a phenomenal cook. I’ve studied Rachel Ray’s business model, and I know my wife would dominate if she would trust me with her talent and passion.” And what do I hear from the wife? “Kelly, I just want something for myself. I just want one activity that brings me back to myself. I want to do it for me. Not for money. Not to scale. Not for anyone else but me.” She puts up a wall because she wants to step into her highest self, but she doesn’t want to be managed or held accountable. She wants to unfold naturally.
And this, my friend, is EXCELLENT news. This means she’s claiming herself. This means you are ONE DECISION AWAY from having a wife that is LIT UP. Imagine coming home from work everyday to a woman that is relaxed. Fulfilled. In her pleasure center. This is the type of energy that completely balances out your high alpha energy, and expands you in the most seductive way.
This is where a coach comes in, and this is my favorite dynamic to work with in couples.
I’ve been coaching entrepreneurs since 2004 when I started working with Dan Sullivan at Strategic Coach. This, incidentally, is where I first met Garrett J. White. He was a client of mine back then, when he was just “Garrett running a mortgage company”. This has been a beautiful example of the student becoming the teacher, and going through his certification was a full circle career highlight.
When I was working at Coach, I noticed from Day One that my clients fell into two camps. Those that counted their marriage or spouse as their greatest asset- and those that didn’t. My clients that counted their spouse as their greatest asset seemed to hit higher levels of holistic success with more fulfillment and less stress. I’ve had attention on the spouse since that realization back in 2004.
However, it was my own divorce from a Beta Male, and subsequent relationship with another entrepreneur, that really gave me the full, personal experience of life on the entrepreneurial spectrum. In my marriage, I was constantly frustrated with my husband for his contentment. I viewed him as lazy and lost respect for him. I knew our marriage was on its last legs when one day he looked at me and asked “why do you always need more? Why can’t this just be enough for you?”
I got a taste of my own medicine in my next relationship. Here, I was with a high octane, fully ambitious Alpha male. I loved it (at first). But as the years drew by, I found myself constantly exhausted. I started feeling like I was on egg shells all the time because his “passion” that I adored in the beginning, was starting to show up as anger at home. I found myself filtering what I was going to say, how I was going to say it, and when would be the least likely time to cause collateral damage. As I’m sure you can imagine, that relationship also unraveled in a spectacular display of built up confusion and rage.
I’ve learned a lot on my personal and professional journey. After I left Strategic Coach when my first son was born in 2007, I went on to run programs like Dream Manager and Lifebook. In 2012, I started The Entreprenewer, an entrepreneurial coaching company, and by 2015, I was consistently integrating the spouse in my coaching. I know that when one person is growing, and the other isn’t, that gap only widens. I call it The Ambition Gap and work diligently to ensure my clients don’t get swallowed up by it.
Does this resonate with you? Are you tired of the tense conversations that spiral into rehashing the past and awkward silences? Are you starting to see a glimmer of light that you may have FINALLY found someone who can support both you and your wife in business and personal growth?
If it’s a Holy Hell Yes, push the Warrior Connection Call button NOW!
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